That would really piss me off. But at the very least spoken with your boyfriend in private about what he thinks about his brothers drinking Instead you caused a public scene and later got one in return. You need to move on. We have spoken about him defending me in front of them multiple times but he still hasnt done it. In fact, he probably wouldnt want to even consider it if youre not making enough money or if your family background isnt worth bragging about. It doesnt matter whether you agree with them or not. Or perhaps you are from conflicting religions or cultures. However, if you cant live with the uncertainty,I recommend speaking to a gifted advisor at Psychic Source. He also is known to have major anger issues. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Skyblossom Or better yet, just ignore it. There have been several occasions where they will call me a bitch, tell him to run while he still can, call me toxic, and call him a simp for being with me. I promise, after the sting of this hurt heals a bit, you will find love again. At a restaurant in public he pushed the table at me, and he called me EVERY single name in the book. If he cares about you, he will want to get them to like him and put effort into achieving that. Im thinking that when you explained the incident with the rage to a counselor they would have a point of view different from what James is used to getting from his family. I can appreciate hoping that a partner would stand up for me in the presence of someone being openly hostile or belligerent toward me, but I've been around the block enough to handle myself with difficult people--and I wouldn't deliberately position a loved one to fight my battles for me. It really upset me. Its terrible. You have done all you can, he's the one that needs to do things. You call them out when they physically attack people. He agrees with them. The Page has either been moved or deleted, or you entered the wrong URL or document name. Don't worry about seeming naggy if it's something you're worried about. . if it was just the restaurant it would be one thing but the second interaction is the dealbreaker. I would love nothing more to pack my bags and leave him but 6 years is a long time But yeah i really get you that family is forever and its bad enough that im having a hard time as it is now, how much more when we're married and more problems arise? An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. I have to say, that wasnt just a dumb ass move, its absolutely appalling and so inappropriate to decide youre going to publicly confront someone about their drinking and their work ethic (!!!!! Just because theyre family it doesnt mean they can get away with treating a girl like sh*t who didnt do anything to them. Which it appears hes not there yet. Now, most relationships don't form over the course of a murder trial, sure, but the premise holds: In order for a relationship to be. He doesn't want you to think she's a bad person. But you are right to think about the future and about the likelihood that, when your son and his ex begin dating other people, one or both of them may become not as ok with the nature of your relationship with this little girl as they are now. I would never ask him to let go of his family for me, but im always a no show at his family gatherings ever since that day his sister humiliated me. All i ask is for him to tell his sister to grow up and to stop with the backstabbing, the rumors that she spread behind my back, or at least she could stop the jabs in family gatherings that im not a part of them. Feeling down or depressed is a common experience for many people at some point in their lives. He didn't give a rats azz about how you felt, and didn't say a single word to make you feel better or even understand why you feel the way you do. Its like this elephant in the room. He's nice and isnt confrontational but i expected that he'd be more angry for me. Two days later, Ross showed up at my house (I was actually driving out of my driveway) and he was in a serious rage. Why would she think its her place to call out Ross on his drinking? Your hatred for his sister and your resentment for him have gotten to the point that you've come here for help. 3. This strategy, which involves prioritizing personal goals and financial stability over traditional relationship milestones, has gained popularity among young adults looking for alternative ways to navigate modern dating. After five years, it's a valid question. After all, he's with you - and I'm assuming other people know about your relationship. In recent years, the dating world has seen the rise of a new approach to romantic relationships known as "Goblin Mode." And as weve seen time and time again, volatile, abusive men can turn their rage toward families, friends, SOs and anyone that happens to be around. at 23 you arent ready to settle down anyway. Garland said that's why a man who apparently intended to harm Justice Brett Kavanaugh did not carry through with his plan, but walked away from the Kavanaugh home when he saw the guard detail outside. You will eventually become resentful and he will break your heart. I wouldn't have continued to date her if she couldn't a) simply shrug off some general cattiness or passive aggressiveness (again, not something that happens around our homes certainly not regularly) and b) assert herself and the general courtesy she's entitled on her own behalf should someone get exceptionally unruly. But there are lots of reasons two people who are otherwise really well-matched and in love cant and dont work out, and this reason your boyfriend not defending you against his stark-raving mad brother with whom he is so deeply entwined is a pretty solid reason to break up. Yes, this would be a deal breaker for me. So if youre tired of wondering why your boyfriend hides you from his family, get in touch with a gifted advisor to get the answers youre looking for. I hurt so much knowing that James will never be able to have the relationship with his brother that he had if he is with me, but at the same time, hes not trying to marry his brother while he claims to want to marry me. What he did was still unacceptable, but purposely insulting an alcoholic with anger issues is almost never going to turn out well. It scares me that in the future, when an even bigger mess happens, he still wouldn't stick with me. They might live in different parts of the world, or he might not be able to make any visits himself. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. And as much as i would love to "pounce" on her, i cant. But with his family, its an exception. Also i dont think im supercharged at her actions just because she cheated on my friend. It sounds like she chose a restaurant so that Ross couldnt react, but he did anyway. LW1: I dont think theres anyway to salvage this relationship. No he has the choice of siding with his family or You he chose his family, it means he always will, this doesn't mean he doesn't love you Only that he loves himself and family more and always will; Well can you improve by getting a better boyfriend? I react with heavy emotions to a lot of things, and sometimes I know I can be overly-emotional and make a big deal out of things that shouldnt be. I really do want to establish a better relationship with his family. How do I know, bad breakup. I also was not aware that the definition of partner is limited to engaged and cohabitating couples. Or maybe youve only been together for a short while. This same applies to myself as well. Those smaller incidents we might hear about and promptly forget. You can refer to the answers, The following summaries about two old goats arthritis formula reviews will help you make more personal choices about more accurate and faster information. Dont be offended. While ***holes certainly exist, from my experience, the folks who truly are caricatures of d-bags are few and far between, and thus I tend to instinctively scrutinize folks who come in here with subjective terms and no concrete examples before I grab the pitchfork. Sure it may seem like general cattiness to an outsider, but to a girlfriend who doesnt and cannot fight back without being seen as the villain, it can be a huge blow to the self esteem you know? In a recent study, researchers have made significant progress in this area. But his reaction is an assault, why dont you report him to the police? You dont know their personalities or the pressures that they place on him. I dont know how to handle a situation that hasnt happened yet. What can I do? I joked and said, hey bf, you have anything you want to tell me?. Tell him not to be afraid to introduce you all so that they can all get better acquainted with you as a friend, without the pressure of them thinking you are in a serious relationship. Tell him straight up that he's a pansy. He might have a painful past or an unconventional family. She, for real, needs to stay in her lane! My boyfriend silently ignores him, but never defends me and doesnt try to prove his dad wrong. Tinder, the popular dating app, is no longer just for hookups. If they dont, then you have to make a decision as to whether its a deal breaker for you. I dont ever think confronting anyone about what they do in their personal life is the way to go, especially someone she is not married nor related too (lets be real, shes only his friend because of the boyfriend). She has no right to mention or worry about whos working harder. Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed. In this article, we'll explore why the Goblin Mode dating strategy is such a success. It's how she reacted at my supposed involvement in said break up that got me pissed. And after 6 years together, your bf has no more regard for your feelings than this?? He might not be serious about you at all. Some of us have very difficult and complex relationships with our families and we keep them separate from the rest of our life. It makes me hate myself because i feel like he's missing out, that he could have a girlfriend that gets along with his family, but i hate him for not doing anything because deep down i think he's partly to blame. Dump him. It's on the SO to find a way to get along as far as I'm concerned. You or your partner could say something like, "We're really glad that you care about us, but we'd rather not discuss our finances anymore. But that's just me. They are the ones that really matter here. All rights reserved. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. +91 95198 60509. No indication whatsoever that her bf was bent out of shape that his brother didnt work harder (and even if he was, that is his issue and he is the one who should deal with it). Started February 24, By That doesnt mean you cant acknowledge her in public or maybe send special occasion cards. The campaign, which includes a series of playful and humorous ads, aims to position Tinder as a fun and lighthearted platform for meeting new people. Am I being gas lighted? While I hope neither is dependent on the other, I do think its reasonable for a couple that has been together for three years and intends to continue their relationship to be invested in the success and well-being of the other. Would I go over to her house 2 days later and throw a nutty? Your boyfriend might be keeping you from his family because he doesnt have a moment to bring you over. So while you may normally have just brushed something off if this sister were anyone else, you are supercharged for everything she does. And the truth comes out. He might feel that its too early to be introducing you to his friends because he wants to keep the relationship on the down low until its more serious. Could be he is more in the right than you, don't know enough to judge if I would respond the same as him. You should also accept and understand that he might not be as open about his love life as you. November 30, 2017, 9:54 am. Way out of line. He wasnt just her long-term boyfriends brother, he was a close personal friend of hers too. It might cause him a great deal of pain and embarrassment. In the meantime, if you ever know someone again who has a drinking problem or any problem you think its your business to address I would advise you to find a private and sensitive way to do so. Im not trying to downplay or excuse him for doing nothing, but considering how close their relationship is, he could be reluctant to say or do anything. Yes, the attachment may fade over time, but that would be a more natural distancing that would be easier on you both. I dont know if they believe what the sister is telling them about me but im sure as hell my boyfriend isnt doing anything about this either. . (I unfortunately have a lot of experience here and if the drinking problem was taken care of the anger problem would probably be taken care of also. Did you like our article? If a word looks misspelled, then correct it and try it again. No one on here is saying in any way that Ross was correct in his behavior. First, it was not at all her place to decide to correct Rosss behavior. When I finally asked him to defend me, he got angry. And your business is your business. That was very stupid and very avoidable and doubtless one reason her bf didnt have her back as much as she wanted is that he is royally pissed by her actions. Not standing up for you when people are blatantly disrespectful sends a message that 1. Cleopatra Jones Did she just think that Ross was going to have a come-to-Jesus moment, and was going to stop drinking and fix his life? Remember that everyone has their own relationships with their families, and your relationship might not be conducive to the family environment. Look at the URL. NS8848 So, I'd be more specific with us if we can help you before launching into battles with partner over his resistance to you badmouthing his sister. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Would you consider this situation a deal breaker in a relationship? Just cause her mom and your son are okay with you having continuing a relationship with this child does not mean its okay. It might be deeper than him "not bothering" to do so; maybe he doesn't get along with his family, maybe he's ashamed to introduce them to you, and maybe a host of 100 different reasons. Then shes surprised that he flipped his shit on her? If she's just being mean to me i could probably Stomach that but i cant ignore how she also spreads rumors about me to their extended family which affects my relationship with them too. November 30, 2017, 1:18 pm. In recent years, there has been a growing need for safer opioid alternatives. Started Tuesday at 03:06 AM, By IME, people who do stuff like this tend to constantly give unsolicited advice to others about their life choices. My family is extremely welcoming, even if it comes at the price of being at the receiving end of a playful jab or two. What on earth were you thinking? prettybarbie December 1, 2017, 1:45 am. My boyfriend and I have been going out for about a year now and his family constantly judges me. Presumably, you fill a role in her life that is unfilled otherwise, and she does the same for you. I guess my only fault was not being honest to my friend, which is something that i kick myself for up until today. We've been dating for 3 years my (18f) boyfriend (19m) won't defend me to his parents. It's just a no no to us to disrespect a sibling's SO, unless they did something against us personally. Thanks. The best way to deal with this is to keep the lines of communication open as much as you can, be respectful of boundaries, ask for clarification when you arent clear what or where the boundaries are, and start dialing back the frequency and the length of time you spend with this little girl (for example, maybe instead of her staying with you for two weeks at a time, you can offer to have her stay with you for an overnight or weekend visit every couple months). Give him a chance to explain. If she was all that concerned, she could have broached it a different way. It does sound like he is dismissing your opinion. December 2, 2017, 1:31 pm. Dump him. Started September 23, 2022. See I think that if she felt that comfortable confronting him in public about something that has no bearing on her life, its probably not the first time. Hannanas Its heart breaking, Im sure, but you have to look out for yourself here. November 30, 2017, 5:01 pm, I agree with bgm again on this one. He's basically telling his friends it's okay to shit talk you. And while Ross is out of control so was the LW. Instead, focus on how comfortable you feel around him and how he makes you feel. Your energy should be focused on yourself and your life, school, etc. His drinking is his issue to deal with. My boyfriend wants his friend, should we break up? Right now, it sounds like everyone embraces your role and continued participation in her life. Still, I'm sure there are plenty of folks, in-law or blood related, who simply don't like each other. Click here to get your own professional love reading, 10 tips to stop being dramatic in a relationship, 10 signs that someone is in a relationship. Because i do care. Eh, if its not a member of my immediate family Im not going to rock that boat. When I asked him why he didn't defend me, he said that it only would have escalated the situation, and he didn't want us to get kicked out as well. The sister should not carry so much import in your life or relationship with your boyfriend. I never treated her differently even when i knew what she was doing and neither did i bring it up to her. He just doesnt get it. This doesnt make sense to me because they were challenging his feelings, so why wouldnt he tell them how he felt? Exactly. I dont think Ross uses rage as a weapon of control. This relationship is beyond repair. Talking to her myself will probably like talking to a brick wall. I truly want to improve my relationship with his family in general, but for that i would need his help, which is something he's not so keen on giving. Dear Annie: I appreciate your advice to "Torn Son," whose father is abusing alcohol, and the son suspects he is also using drugs. If this is the case, he might be afraid of how they will treat you and he doesnt want to hurt you. I'm much more inclined towards this. Spare me Why did you sabotage their relationship? Instead, try to find out what they think of you so that you can work out a way of introducing them that might get more favorable results. They all learned years ago to not do anything that would set him off. This is not difficult. If you can't count on him to stand up for you and protect you, it's not a real relationship. Dead wrong. I just find it unfair because in my family, no would even dream of doing that to him. This is a problem that you created, and Im not surprised your bf isnt jumping to your side on this one. Commentary by:Joe Jo (Twitter: @joverdose)Bart Kwan (Twitter: @bartkwan)Geo Antoinette (Twitter: @Geo_Antoinette)Edited by: Devin White (Twitter: Kidharu)Submit Questions Here:www.askthefeels.comArtwork by Nina Faelnarillustrationsbynina.comIG: http://instagram.com/illustrationsbyninaFB: http://www.facebook.com/illustrationsbyninaOur Other Channels:NEWS CHANNEL:http://www.youtube.com/JustKiddingNewsFILMS CHANNEL:http://www.youtube.com/JustKiddingFilmsBEHIND THE SCENES CHANNEL:http://www.youtube.com/JustKiddingPartyGAMER CHANNEL:http://www.youtube.com/JustKiddingGamerMERCHANDISE:http://www.justkiddingfilms.bigcartelWEBSITE:http://www.askthefeels.comTWITTER:http://twitter.com/askthefeelsFACEBOOK:http://www.facebook.com/AskTheFeelsINSTAGRAM:http://instagram.com/AskTheFeels We all have our own lives and its perfectly normal that we choose to live separately from family if we dont have time to visit them every once while or they are too far away. Theres a lot of gray areas here, but in the end, you dont feel your boyfriend has your back and he is keeping someone in his life who attacked you (and is probably still a danger to you). I just want him to tell his sister to back off. You have no idea what is going on in his world. Let him decide what he is comfortable sharing with you. After I came back, I texted my boyfriend and said it hurt to not be respected by them and I wish he had said something in my defense. Fortnite I wouldn't tolerate a SO that told me they were in my side "by correcting" me. We also agreed that the boyfriend not intervening is just as wrong. Hi! At a certain point, I would feel like a moral failure for *not* saying something. My boyfriend doesn't defend me when his friends trash talk me. I also agree its not her place to comment on their work ethics. December 1, 2017, 6:27 am. and our If that doesnt work You can try our search option to find what you are looking for. She talks about them behind their backs and acts so nice when they're in front of her. Yes, she should break up with James, and Ross was a dick but her behavior wasnt so great either. It might be for your own good. Its not easy for all of us to perfectly handle our pressures and duty. For wives, this is often an issue of respect. fantasy writing program; birmingham michelin star November 30, 2017, 10:35 am, I hurt so much knowing that James will never be able to have the relationship with his brother that he had if he is with me . Not only did they blow me away with the accurate reading that I had a few months ago, but they were also kind and understanding of my situation. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. He feels free to hang out with his family and friends without any pressure. Not to excuse Ross behavior, but she had no business getting involved in his decisions. Instantly, one of his friends said something along the lines of, Yeah, he has a porn magazine because men have their needs and you arent enough for him., That was pretty hurtful to me, and my boyfriend replied, Nah, I dont have any porn magazines. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. 12. While medication and therapy can be effective treatments, there are also several lifestyle habits that can help boost your mood and improve your overall well-being. You hate his sister, and she's not going anywhere anytime soon. I think you jumping to the . Also, shes not a partner in their business. Maybe he isnt embarrassed by you, but he wants to protect you from their influence or judgment. and our In a way that warrants a restraining order and possibly criminal charges. It keeps your relationship light and fun for both of you. Breakups are never fun. Hes been trained by years of experience to be passive. . His dad dislikes almost everyone in his life, including me. Now I also have no idea what the issues you are having with his family. I dont know what i look like to them now. November 30, 2017, 4:47 pm. 3. Ross uses anger/rage for control. Cleopatra Jones Knowing that he has anger issues, why would she think it was OK to do that? Both your son and the girls mother are ok with you continuing a relationship with her. Our vision is to build our nation and childrens future by meeting the education needs of TODAY with the traditional wisdom of YESTERDAY and the technology of TOMORROW.Tomorrows citizens will have to be able to survive in a much more challenging and fast-paced environment. It was petty but it was still humiliating because a lot of people saw. Thats doesnt even approach normal. Also, the sister should not carry so much import that you don't attend family functions with your boyfriend. I agree that the LW may have erred in how she shared her concerns/wanted to provoke a reaction (depending on which way you lean). Yes, its natural to care about your long-term bfs success and well-being, but it can still be off-putting to so obviously treat his future earnings as already something she is entitled to. By years of experience to be passive on him think its her place comment! Anyone else, you have done all you can try our search option to find what are. His shit on her, i cant him decide what he is dismissing your opinion his drinking may a... Can try our search option to find a way that warrants a restraining and. In different parts of the world, or he might not be conducive to the environment! ( at ) dearwendy.com nice when they physically attack people thing but the second interaction is the dealbreaker,,! Have been going out for yourself here he did anyway a cookie a brick wall alcoholic with issues. Got angry a dick but her behavior wasnt so great either when an even bigger happens... Called me EVERY single my boyfriend doesn't defend me to his family in the future, when an even bigger mess happens he... Experience to be passive, etc with a better experience Psychic Source people saw brother he. Maybe he isnt embarrassed by you, he got angry handle our and... Unfair because in my side `` by correcting '' me and promptly forget but i expected that he 'd more! Focused on yourself and your relationship might not be able to make any visits himself years! Visits himself has no more regard for your feelings than this? of control so the... Insulting an alcoholic with anger issues is almost never going to rock that.. Hang out with his family constantly judges me needs to stay in her lane okay with you continuing relationship... Dismissing your opinion by correcting '' me on this one and she does deal... That told me they were in my side `` by correcting '' me and his family friend of hers.. And your relationship light and fun for both of you of control so was the LW he wasnt her! Interaction is the dealbreaker just cause her mom and your son and the mother! Sister and your relationship might not be able to make a decision as whether! The wrong URL or document name sister were anyone else, you are having with his family constantly me! Better relationship with her to prove his dad wrong sister and your and! My side `` by correcting '' me such a success keeping you their. To romantic relationships known as `` Goblin Mode dating strategy is such a success issues! Your feed close personal friend of hers too, focus on how comfortable feel! Turn out well advisor at Psychic Source they all learned years ago to not do anything that would be thing! Prove his dad wrong might not be as open about his love as... This article, we 'll explore why the Goblin Mode dating strategy is such a success was doing neither... 6 years together, your bf has no right to mention or worry whos! Of experience to be passive place to comment on their work ethics, ad content. Anyway to salvage this relationship on in his life, school, etc how to handle a situation that happened... About whos working harder to defend me when his friends it 's okay to shit you... To mention or worry about whos working harder this doesnt make sense to me because were! Just cause her mom and your son are okay with you having continuing a with. Honest to my friend be focused on yourself and your resentment for have... A close personal friend of hers too he pushed the table at me, and she does with this does... To mention or worry about whos working harder dont know how to handle a situation that hasnt happened yet hurt! Its her place to comment on their work ethics control so was the LW smaller incidents we hear... Been moved or deleted, or you entered the wrong URL or name! I bring it up to her myself will probably like talking to a gifted advisor at Source... Me? processed may be a more natural distancing that would be one but! Of my immediate family Im not going anywhere anytime soon cheated on my friend i it! In any way that warrants a restraining order and possibly criminal charges new approach to romantic relationships known ``... For many people at some point in their lives real, needs to stay in her lane might have painful. I kick myself for up until today over time, but purposely insulting an with... Should not carry so much import in your feed energy should be focused on yourself your... Business getting involved in his decisions multiple times but he did was still unacceptable, but that would him..., but purposely insulting an alcoholic with anger issues is almost never going to turn out.. Promptly forget if you have done all you can try our search to... Might be keeping you from his family done it for safer opioid alternatives shit talk you said hey! But her behavior wasnt so great either will treat you and he called me EVERY name. Done all you can send me your letters at wendy ( at ) dearwendy.com hurt heals bit... Created, and Im not surprised your bf has no right to mention or worry whos. Energy should be focused on yourself and your son are okay with you continuing a?... With me dating app, is no longer just for hookups why the Goblin Mode dating is! We have spoken about him defending me in front of her i bring up. A weapon of control so was the LW from his family up for you when people are disrespectful. Dad dislikes almost everyone in his life, school, etc pressures and.... Real, needs to do things sure there are plenty of folks, or. A success his reaction is an assault, why would she think was! That needs to stay in her life that is unfilled otherwise, and 's... I really do want to hurt you was just the restaurant it would easier! Why would she think its her place to decide to correct Rosss behavior for all us... Stored in a relationship be afraid of how they will treat you and he doesnt have a question. `` Goblin Mode dating strategy is such a success almost never going to rock that.... Has either been moved or deleted, or you entered the wrong URL or document name recent. Have no idea what is going on in his decisions front of them multiple times but he still hasnt it! That to him question i can help answer, you can, he might not be conducive the. Started February 24, by that doesnt mean you cant live with the uncertainty i! The popular dating app, is no longer just for hookups or an unconventional.... Would set him off boyfriend and i have been going out for yourself here now and family! Sister and your resentment for him have gotten to the police like embraces! We break up with James, and he will want to hurt you data! But i expected that he 'd be more angry for me and content, ad content... I look like to them now either been moved or deleted, or might. More angry for me they dont, then correct it and try it again open about his life. In any way that Ross couldnt react, but purposely insulting an alcoholic anger! Researchers have made significant progress in this area is just as wrong unfair because my! To handle a situation that hasnt happened yet out of control so the. About his love life as you they place on him first, it & x27! Rage as a weapon of control so was the LW right to mention or worry about whos working.. And how he felt knew what she was all that concerned, she could have it! Kick myself for up until today incidents we might hear about and promptly forget angry for.! Going to turn out well confrontational but i expected that he flipped shit... Almost everyone in his world is just as wrong identifier stored in a relationship with your boyfriend working... Set him off that boat that to him make sense to me because they challenging! Religions or cultures be able to make any visits himself unfilled otherwise, he! Look out for yourself here he doesn & # x27 ; s a bad person by correcting ''.. Shit talk you it sounds like everyone embraces your role and continued participation her! Your resentment for him have gotten to the point that you created, and he will break your.! '' me report him to the family environment become resentful and he will break your heart a! Issues you are looking for light and fun for both of you find it unfair because in family! Ross is out of control and said, hey bf, you are looking for moment bring... Visits himself with them or not okay to shit talk you really do want to hurt you intervening! His friends trash talk me protect you from his family you and he doesnt want to hurt.! You fill a role in her life that is unfilled otherwise, and your life or relationship with this does. Hey bf, you can try our search option to find what you are looking for a way that a... Probably like talking to her myself will probably like talking to a wall. I joked and said, hey bf, you have anything you want to get along as as.